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I admit that I am only human, and as such, I deal with the everyday "real" life, just like every other human out there. Sometimes I pretend I am some sort of Demi-God who can fashion extra time out of strands of stars. Reality serves to remind me that as a creative professional and a mere mortal, I need to be considerate of the fact that, Art is long, and Time is short. (Who was it who first said that Keats or Rilke? I cannot remember.)
In writing this I am reminded of another quote I have always loved by the solemn poetess, Slyvia Plath, who ironically didn't live out the full measure of her life to even come close to being all the things she desired to be.
“I can never read all the books I want; I can never be all the people I want and live all the lives I want. I can never train myself in all the skills I want. And why do I want? I want to live and feel all the shades, tones and variations of mental and physical experience possible in life. And I am horribly limited.”
There have been a lot of things happening here at Shadow Horse Studios, which many of you know, is the home of Glass Eyed Pony Photography. After a long hiatus from my photography and learning the ropes of motherhood, I am back at my photography and loving every moment of it. I am taking a step back from the craziness of the commercial art world and limiting the amount of concept work I do as well as illustrative work.
I would like to focus on my own fine art, mostly my wildlife and equine fine art in addition to working on my Waiting on Dragons digital art fantasy series. I have also ventured into the realm of online video tutorials and plan on unveiling my first video via my YouTube channel very soon. I also have a new shooter at my side, Iryna Krutchko, who hails from Russia.
I really do believe that there is a rhyme and reason to all things and that there is a certain destiny that unfolds for us all. I am in awe of the people who come into my life and I am even more blown away by the similar traits I share with them. The closest people in my life tend to be rather jovial, yet serious, interesting and unique out of the box characters who share the the same loves I do; art, photography, animals, computers, poetry, moments, and more! They are also usually as OCD about what they do as I am, and find a deep satisfaction in the constant pursuit of perfection.
Upon meeting, Iryna and I shared an instant connection. We both are horse crazy girls with a passion for photography and capturing life's moments, good or bad. She isn't afraid to express herself visually through her own personal photography work, much like I am, though I tend to do so with a lot of poetry mixed in. She sees the beauty in everything, even the "ugly" and what some people may consider the "uninspiring". I really respect people who are capable of seeing above and beyond, and she is definitely someone who does this well.
We also shared a similar yet very different circumstance to our lives, which has only given us more strength and drive to go out there do what we love. Iryna recently experienced a loss while I experienced a gain. Iryna had come to the States to be with her fiance but shortly after moving, she lost him in a motorcycle accident and has been slowly recovering and finding herself again and is ready to to spread her wings and take flight again!
Where Iryna lost life and I was gaining a life. I recently became a mother to a wonderful little boy named Connor. I cannot imagine my life without him and can honestly say I have never experienced a love so profound as the love I have for him. He is my everything, literally. I am being very open and sincere when I say Connor was my unexpected little gift and having to prepare for his arrival did throw a loop in my plans, but also gave me the reason to follow my dreams.
I knew I didn't want to be a starving artist, which was why I went into teaching for a little while as I worked as a concept artist and illustrator. I had been using my photography for stock and reference materials (mostly shooting models for fantasy work etc). I used to be a film photographer and was very serious about my photography at that time. However the advent of the DSLR suddenly turned everyone into a so-called "pro". I and I took to photographing just for myself and selling fine art prints.
I had bills to pay and I wanted to slowly build myself and my business. Teaching gave me a consistent paycheck, time to create, and the summers off to take on more work. But becoming a mother gave me not only the wings, but the strength and courage to plunge into my creative world as a full time endeavor. I can say now, Everything I do I do in part for my precious Connor. I found a renewed love for the camera again, this time the DSLR and I haven't looked back.
Iryna and I both are at a point in our lives where its time to spread our wings and fly, take our lives and our dreams, and fly high! Together we are offering affordable photography packages, weddings included, in addition to many other photographic services, including retouching and digital manipulation.
I am loving every minute of this experience even if it doesn't come easy. There are times I go without sleeping just to get marketing materials finished and images processed, logos, websites, fine art pieces, and illustrations for clients done. Did I mention I am somewhat of a
Of course with a 16 month old who is into everything I have have learned how to somewhat juggle real life with work life rather well. Aside finding my son in the guest bathroom sink after answering a phone call (how he managed to climb up there, I haven't the slightest clue), I can now consider myself a "working" mom.
I am lucky to be able to work and spend a large amount of my time with my son, every mother dreams of this opportunity. When I am working in my studio and find myself frustrated all I have to do is stop, take a deep breathe, and look over to the little drawing easel and toy area in my studio where my son is playing, and thank my lucky stars for being able to do what I love and be with my son.
I also have the support I need from many loved ones and of course my other creative friends who, for lack of a better way of describing it, have lit a fire under my arse to get me moving! Thank you all!
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